Sleeping Safe and Sound

There is nothing more peaceful than the sight of a sleeping baby. At the same time, there is no thought more terrifying than that, your baby may die while sleeping soundly. Unfortunate as it is, there are a few instances of cot deaths. Every parents main concern is to keep their baby safe and sound even when they are asleep. Though numerous studies have been done on cot deaths, no one has been able to pin point the reason for the same. This fatality seems to be caused when a number of factors work together and affect the baby some particular way. Researchers have come up a few simple rules to be followed, which considerably lower the risk of cot death while the baby is asleep. Follow these rules to help your baby sleep safely

• Make your baby sleep on his/her back.
• Make the baby sleep in the 'feet-to-foot' position and away from the end of the cot. Place the baby in such a way that, the feet of the baby are facing the foot of the cot, but are not touching the end of the cot.
• The right temperature for a baby's room is 18 degrees centigrade (65 F). Babies should never get very hot.
• Do not use an electric blanket or a hot water bottle in the baby's cot.
• They should not be allowed to sleep either in direct sunlight or near a fire or heater.
• The baby's clothes, sheets and blankets must be made of cotton only.
• While sleeping all they need is nappy, vest and sleep suit. If it is a hot night them make sure you dress the baby lightly.
• Do not use duvets or sheepskins until the baby is a year old.
• The room in which the baby sleeps must be smoke free. Do not smoke or allow anyone to smoke while near the baby.
• During the first six months make sure that the baby cot is in your bedroom.
• Avoid sleeping with your baby on the sofa.
• If you smoke, drink alcohol, are taking medicines or drugs which will make you sleep deeply, then do not allow your baby to share your bed.
• Do not cover the baby's head unless it is very cold, as they lose excess heat from their head and face.
• When the baby has a fever his covering should be light and not heavy as is often believed.
• The baby's bedding, mattress, covering should be kept clean, sun-dry and aired.

Baby Sleeping Bags

In France, sleeping bags are used for babies from the time they are born. But in England they are recommended only for babies who are four months and above. After the age of four months or so, your baby is more likely to form a pattern of waking and sleeping and the intervals between feeds grow longer. The coziness of a baby sleeping bag can help reinforce this pattern, and give your baby the security he or she needs to sleep. Here is the info you need to know about baby sleeping bags:

• There are a number of things that disturb a sleeping baby - a wet nappy, hunger, pain or because they are feeling cold. Feeling cold is the most common reason that parents tend to overlook. As they sleep, their body temperature is lowered and if they have accidentally kicked off their blanket, they wake up, waking up the household. Using a sleeping bag will keep your baby warm without extra covers that can be displaced. As your baby can move and kick her legs in the sleeping bag as well, she will not feel constrained.
• Choose your baby's sleeping bag according to season so that he or she stays comfortably warm and does not overheat. Bags are given a TOG rating according to the warmth they provide, higher the figure warmer the bag. In winter a first-size baby sleeping bag should have a rating of 4 TOG - 2.2 TOG that is the average. In summer you'll need a sleeping bag with a lower TOG rating. When using a new bag, check it to ensure that the design and weight do not lead to overheating.
• Make sure that the room in which your baby sleeps is not too warm - the ideal room temperature for a baby is 18 degrees C (65 º F).
• Look for a sleeping bag with deep sleeve holes, so that the air has room to circulate thus preventing your baby from overheating. Underneath the sleeping bag your baby can wear a cotton sleep suit, pajamas or just a vest or T-shirt in summer.

Baby Massage

Baby massage is an ancient childcare practice that is still practiced all over the world. Recent medical research has proven the benefits of the same. Studies have shown that premature babies when regularly massaged require minimum hospitalization. All newborns show healthy growth, more weight gain and thrive better if they are massaged well, regularly.

A good oil massage soothes and calms a baby, helps them to relax and sleep better and makes them more alert during their waking hours. It is a good exercise and promotes motor activity and emotional security in a child besides, a healthy body and muscular development. It stimulates digestion and helps the baby pass gas.

Massage increases blood circulation in the body. It also helps in parent-child bonding. As soon as the child is born, the baby needs to spend quality time with his parents. Talking and smiling to him while massaging him keeps a child happy, making the baby, more secure and robust. Here are some tips on massaging technique for babies:

• It is a good practice to keep all things you ready before you start rubbing the oil on the baby's body. This includes, the baby massage oil or the vegetable oil, tissues, clean diapers and clothes.
• Baby's skin is very soft and bracelet, rings and long nails might hurt your child accidentally. So keep your fingernails short and keep aside the jewellery pieces you wear on hands when you are massaging the baby.
• Spread a changing mat or a soft towel on a flat surface and undress the baby. Put the baby down with his or her face up.
• Rub only about half-a-teaspoon of oil at a time on your palms so they glide easily on the baby's body. You can apply more oil later as needed.
• Make sure that your palms are warm. Aromatherapy oils for adults may not be suitable for the baby.
• Use smooth, gentle but firm strokes with your palm or fingers. Light circular movements on chest and stomach, stroking across the shoulders, downward movement on the arms and legs and upward movements on the back are the best.
• Do not put too much pressure on the baby's fragile body and avoid the spine area.
• Keep the baby engaged while massaging him or her by talking or singing to the infant.
• Eye contact with the baby ensures him or her of your undivided attention.
• Sudden break in contact of your hands may cause alarm to the baby, take care to be gentle while stopping the massage.
• Do not oil baby's palms or fingers as these little ones tend to put them in their mouths or eyes often and this may cause them irritation.
• Wrap the baby in a clean and warm towel after the massage and cuddle him or her.
• Do not massage the baby just before or after feeding, or when the baby is ill.
• Do not wake the baby up for a massage.
• Avoid rashes, wounds or areas where the baby has got his injections or vaccines as it may hurt.

You can continue to massage your baby till he is three or four years old, as the benefits of a good massage are numerous.

Baby Sleep Patterns

Once the baby is born, your baby will spend the better part of the day sleeping. Sleeping is an essential and important activity for your baby. Growth hormones work most effectively when the baby is asleep. Initially for the first few months, your baby will continue with their own sleep pattern, sleeping as and when they like. As they grow older they will slowly learn to adjust their sleep pattern to your daily routine. When they are about three months old your baby will normally, sleep for 10 hours at night on the whole, even if he or she wakes up in between. Your baby's daytime sleep can often be divided into two sessions - morning and afternoon.

Everybody has his or her opinion when it comes to care and upbringing of a baby, therefore sleep is no different. Even the simple task of deciding the length of a baby's nap, or how to put your baby to sleep has become complicated, because of the number of opinions you will get. As a result of the emotional involvement in caring for your baby every small aspect becomes an issue. Most mothers are more than happy to make adjustments and will schedule their sleeping pattern to fit their baby's sleep pattern. This ensures that mother and baby sleep together which is ideal. Sleeping together ensure strong emotional bonding between the mother and her baby. Studies have shown that babies who sleep with their mother receive more touching, breastfeeding and protection.

If you feel that your baby should have a sleep pattern that is convenient for everyone at home and that does not interfere with your sleep pattern, you will have to make the baby learn a sleep pattern. One of the most common ways to make a baby sleep, is to use music, either sing to the baby or play some soothing music and before you know the baby is fast asleep. This is a method that has been tried and tested over the years and this wisdom has been passed on from generation to generation, though the type of music used may vary.

Some parents choose a particular song for each child and sing this special song day after day at the baby's bedtime. They begin this when the baby is a few days old. After some time the baby gets conditioned and will sleep easily once you start singing the song. If you don't want your baby to get used to the habit of being rocked to sleep you can try using a musical toy. Wind-up this toy and it will play music for a few minutes. Use this toy every time you want to make your baby sleep. Place it close to his or her cot. After sometime he or she will get accustomed to falling asleep to the sound of the musical toy. This method will help your baby sleep comfortably even if you are away from home.

Today CDs are created with specific music, which help very young babies fall asleep. While selecting music, they use music with the same beats per minute as the heartbeat of the mother, which the baby hears while in the womb. This has a soothing effect on the young baby, helps him relax and fall asleep comfortably. You can choose whatever method suits you or try all of them and decide which one works best for your baby.

Postnatal Depression

There is an enormous feeling of relief and gratitude once the delivery is over. After months of waiting and apprehension, when the child is born healthy, the sense of fulfillment is immense. But the first few weeks, even months after childbirth, with the baby can be confusing and emotionally draining. There maybe other reasons for distress as well. If the delivery does not take place as planned. If you have a Caesarean section, or an assisted delivery when all the while you were told it would be normal. All this can have great emotional consequences for the mother. You may feel cheated, angry and very sad.

These events can cause postnatal depression in new mothers. There is still no universal definition for postnatal depression. It is accepted that it is a type of depression that mother's experience weeks or months after childbirth. 10 to 15 percent of all new mothers undergo postnatal depression. But some researchers believe the rate could be higher as a number of cases go undiagnosed. There are three main types of postnatal depression:

• The 'Blues': This is alternatively called 'three-day-blue' or 'baby blues'. More than half the new mothers suffer from this, sooner or later, within the first week after childbirth. The main symptoms are feeling like crying without any reason and feeling down in the dumps. The only treatment this kind of depression needs is a lot of love, support and sympathy from the immediate family of the new mother.
• Postnatal depression: If depression commences weeks or months after delivery, doctors would diagnose it as postnatal depression. But it is likely that the symptoms were present months before the diagnosis. Most new mothers will feel anxious, feel tired, and seem to lack confidence, feel less energetic and feel guilty. A mother with postnatal depression may experience a number of the following symptoms together:

1. Lack of Energy.
2. Breaking down into tears every now and then.
3. Feeling anxious.
4. Feeling of guilty.
5. Increased irritability.
6. Seems to be in constant confusion.
7. Experience sleep disturbance.
8. Indecisive.
9. Lack of self-esteem.
10. Lack of confidence in her ability to be a good mother.
11. Does not enjoy motherhood.
12. Fears that she will harm herself or her baby.
13. Show loss of interest in her sex life.
14. Lose her appetite.
15. Hostile or indifferent to people she loves.
16. Lack of concentration.
17. Feel ashamed at being unable to be happy.
18. Feel helpless.

• Puerperal Psychosis: This is most severe form of this depression and occurs very rarely. There may be one or two cases in every 1000 new mothers and if is different from postnatal depression. In this illness, the mother may seem to lose touch with reality from time to time. She may even have hallucinations and have mood swings. Sometimes she maybe very energetic and at other times very lethargic. This kind of behavior can be upsetting to her family members, who will soon realize that she is ill whereas in postnatal depression the family members may not know that the mother is depressed until she tells them explicitly. In most cases, the mother will have to be hospitalized, preferably with the baby. The patients can recover completely though it may take some time.

Mothers facing postnatal depression must look for support and help from where ever they can get it. Whether it is their family, friends, mother-to-mother support groups or doctors. They must ensure they get help; otherwise, it will affect both the mother and her newborn baby.

Your Body Postnatal

A woman's body undergoes tremendous change during pregnancy. As soon as the baby is out of womb, the body begins its physical healing process, so as to restore the body to its pre-pregnancy state. The uterus, which during pregnancy contains four-and-half liters of water, begins to reduce in size almost immediately after delivery. In about six weeks time, the uterus, reverts close to the pre-pregnancy weight of about 50g from a weight of 1000g. The lining within the uterus crumbles and is drained away as Lochia. This is the blood that is lost over a few weeks after delivery. Important organs like the heart, lung and circulatory system that were burdened during pregnancy get back to functioning normally. The vagina slowly returns to its former shape.

Exercising the vagina will help it regain its original shape quickly. Wounds to the uterus, perineum (the area between the vagina and anus) and vagina heal rapidly. After delivering the child, the levels of the hormone progesterone are restored to normal. Hence a number of problems related to pregnancy disappear. Heartburns vanish, varicose veins get better and constipation is reduced. Piles take a longer time to get better. During pregnancy, hormones soften the joints of the pelvis and spine, and these take time to return to normal. You can have trouble with your back for many months after delivery, so one should avoid lifting and carrying things that are very heavy. The stomach muscles that have been stretched to twice their length, regain their firmness in a few months.

But regaining your originally weight may take some time and effort from your side. Most of the weight is lost within a few days of childbirth, as the excess water carried during pregnancy is flushed out as urine. Thereafter weight loss slows down, but if you continue to breastfeed your baby for more that six months, you will find that your weight in decreasing naturally. The entire process of being pregnant and childbirth is an emotional time. So it will help if you have someone to talk to about how you feel, your fears and apprehension etc. If you cannot find anyone to talk write it down, even this will help you feel better. Some maternity homes allow the new parents to go through the experience they had. Doing this helps to reduce the emotional impact for the parents. If the parents were dissatisfied by the care given to them at the maternity home, they can raise this issue here.

Simple Exercises For New Mothers

Childbirth and care of the newborn are both physically exhausting tasks. Most new mothers' find that, they do not have the same energy level that, they had before their baby was born. In the first few months the mother's night sleep is disturbed and this adds to the exhaustion. The pressures of taking care of a newborn and managing the house leaves the mother mentally and physically drained. A number of new mothers have found that, finding the time to do a few simple exercises, increases their energy levels and makes them feel better mentally as well.

Before you join any postnatal exercise class, it is better to consult your doctor and once he has given you a clean chit of health, you can start exercising. Joining an exercise class will not only keep you fit, but you will make friends with other new mothers, with whom you could form a support group for each other. Here are a few simple exercises that you could try:

• Leg slide: Lie flat on your back, with your knees bent and feet flat on the floor. Put your hands under your lower back, flat on the ground. While you breathe out, slide your legs gently forward, bringing the knees to the ground. Breathe in and slowly slide your legs up to the starting position.
• Pelvic rock: Lie on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the floor. While breathing out move your pelvis in a rocking movement so that your lower back is flat on the floor. Then move your pelvis again so that your lower back is lifted from the floor.
• Pelvic floor exercises: Contract your vagina in the same way as you would to stop yourself from passing urine and count till four. Then relax; you should feel the difference between the two positions. Repeat this exercise in set of six several times a day. Contract and relax your vagina in quick succession. Breathe normally while doing these exercises.

Start exercising at the earliest after delivery, even if you have had a Caesarean section. Exercising will improve circulation and aid in healing. Begin slowly in the initial weeks after childbirth. Do not lie flat on your back and lift both your legs in the air. Do not do sit-ups.

Getting Through Postnatal Depression

f a new mother in your family is suffering from postnatal depression, it is difficult to deal with the person. But the family and friends of the new mother must be supportive and lovingly help her through this phase. Here are some tips on how to help:

• Allow and help the mother of express her anxieties openly. Do not disregard them, as they are real to her.
• Mothers going through postnatal depression find it difficult to cope. Make sure that there is someone with her at all times.
• Encourage her in whatever she is doing and praise her when she is making a sincere effort. Try not to sound patronizing.
• Do not force her to do anything she does not want to.
• Ask her to take time off and go out with friends while someone takes care of the baby.
• Do not say things that will reinforce the feeling of guilt, which is already present because she is unable to appreciate and enjoy the baby.
• Do not point out mistakes she makes, jobs she hasn't been able to finish or comment on the way she looks. She maybe feeling miserable just watching you do things more efficiently than she can.

There are numerous ways that family and friends can help and support a mother going through postnatal depression. We have gathered some tips from depressed mothers on the areas they would like help:

• Be sensitive enough to understand when they need help and when they want to be left alone.
• Help in running the house and the care of other children
• Shop for the things the new baby needs and the mother cannot go out to buy.

Postnatal depression is such an illness that it can easily be hidden from family and friends. In most cases the women are so ashamed and guilt ridden about the way they feel that they do not ask for help at all. Many doctors have started screening women for postnatal depression with the help of a simple questionnaire. This is being done to help those who require it. Help is offered through counseling, forming support groups or use of medication.

• Counseling: In this form of the treatment the mother is encouraged to talk openly and honestly about her feelings. The therapist listens to her without being judgmental or critical. Together they will find a way to cope with the situation at hand.
• Support groups: Meeting and talking to others who are going through the same experience gives the mother an opportunity to realize that she is not the only one, going through postnatal depression.
• Medication: Doctors usually prescribe anti-depression or hormones or even Prozac. But studies show that these medications are not good for the baby as the mother is breastfeeding. Counseling and support groups can help just as efficiently in recovery.

Here are a few things the mothers' suffering from postnatal depression can do to help them through this period:

• Talk about your feelings to anyone who will give you a patient hearing. It would be best to talk to your husband or a friend. You should talk to your doctor as well.
• Just take care of yourself and remember that what you are going through is not your fault.
• Doctors have found that joining exercise classes, yoga or a walking club helps new mothers relax and helps them recover easily from depression.
• Keep in mind that this is just a passing phase and that you will get better, even if it takes time. Recovery may be speedy if you ask for help and support from family or even take professional help.

Caring For Stitches

When asked about their experience of delivering a baby, most women will tell you that, it was like rebirth. There is no doubt about the fact that, having a baby is one of the most exhilarating experiences in the world. But there is as much pain as there is joy in this experience and a lot of people overlook this fact. A new mother not only has to care of her newborn baby but also has to take care of herself as well, to ensure that she heals well. Even in a normal delivery sometimes it is likely that you have had an episiotomy. An Episiotomy is a surgical cut to enlarge the vagina to allow the baby's head to emerge easily during delivery. Some women may tear their perineum (the area between the vagina and anus). In both the above cases, you are likely to have stitches that need taking care of. Given below are a few easy tips to ensure that the stitches heal well:

• Ensure that the perineum is clean at all times. After using the toilet, take a mug of lukewarm water pour it slowly between your legs while sitting on the toilet. Urinating while bathing will help reduce the pain. After this dry gently with a soft towel. Do not use a hair dryer to dry out excess water, as it hinders healing and may infect the wound.
• You can bath as and when you feel like. Use water with or without antiseptic or salt will do just as well.
• You can add a little lavender oil to your bath water and have a very soothing bath.
• Replace maternity pads as often as you need.
• Use disposable panties or comfortable cotton panties with a high waist.
• While sitting down make sure you sit on something soft.
• You can try using gel pads; these can be used easily like a panty liner. These are specially made to reduce the discomfort and pain most women feel after delivering.
• Try to move around as much as you can. It may be difficult and painful at first, but this will increase blood circulation, decrease swelling and speed up the healing process.
• The experiences of many women suggest that taking arnica tablets reduces bruising and helps recovery. There is no research to support this fact, but you can still try it.

If pain persists in spite of these measures, you should consult a doctor. If your stitches are too tight then they will have to be redone or the doctor may give you an anesthetic cream to apply locally. Take whatever measures are required to recover comfortably and you may not suffer any unnecessary pains.

Looking After Yourself

Soon after the baby arrives, all your energy and attention will be focused on the care and comfort of the baby. You may consciously want to focus on the baby and not pay much attention to taking care of yourself. Inspite of your busy schedule you will have to make time to take care of yourself. Your health both physical and psychological is undergoing a healing process after delivery and you will have to pay attention to it. Once the baby has arrived all your family and friends will want to visit you and your newborn baby. Having too many visitors just after delivery, with the new baby can be very stressful and extremely difficult to handle, whether in the hospital or at home. It would be best if you could control the number of visitors you have, by asking friends and family to space their visits.

During the initial weeks after delivery, it is best to accept all the help you can get in doing the various chores around the house. It would be ideal if you could get your mother, mother-in-law, any relative or friend to stay with you for at least the first month. This will definitely ease the pressure off you and will help you get used to having the baby as part of your routine. The first few weeks can be overwhelming and some new mothers just cannot cope with the pressures of having a new baby. If you have a relative or a friend staying with you, the pressure on will reduce considerably as they will pitch in. You may even find some free time for yourself while they are taking care of the baby. Here are a few tips to new mothers to cope with those initial days:

• Take breaks from taking care of the baby as and when you can. When you do so, don't feel guilty, as it is necessary for your mental and physical well being.
• Have your meals regularly.
• Make sure you include fresh fruits and green vegetables in your meals.
• Use pre-prepared foods to reduce time and energy spent on cooking.
• If friends and family are willing to take over some of your chores, allow them to do so.
• Your night's sleep will be disturbed in the initial days. So learn to sleep whenever your baby sleeps.
• This is a period of great emotional upheaval. Talk to people who can help and will support you - mother, friend, doctor or anyone who will give you a patient hearing.
• If there is a local support group for new mothers, it would be a good idea to join it or at least attend a few meetings.

The important thing is to find time to rest and relax. As a new mother you must not think about anything other than the baby and yourself. Try to enjoy this new status to the fullest, despite the difficulties.

Planning Your Day With The Baby

As you have a new baby, whose care will take up most of your time, it is better you make a plan and have a daily routine in place. Since you will have to take care of the baby, the rest of your family, your house and yourself, you may not be able to work as efficiently as you did earlier. Accept this and make changes at home to make things easier for you. Make a realistic plan that you can achieve without much difficulty and distress. We have complied tips from others parents on how to manage your home and your baby in those initial days.

• If you can afford it, hire someone, to help with some of the chores around the house like cleaning, ironing, shopping etc.
• On the weekends, you and your partner can take turns, in looking after the baby so that you get sometime off.
• Cook your dinner early, as you will be exhausted by evening and will have to begin cooking all over again. At least prepare most of it so that you have very little to do later.
• Encourage others to take care of your baby; by telling them how good they are at it and how happy the baby is to see them. This way they will enjoy taking care of the little one and you will get a much-deserved break.
• If you have any problems or concerns about caring for your new baby, seek the help of an expert, either your doctor or counselor etc. They will be more than happy to help you.
• Everyday make time to do something that you enjoy and makes you happy. It can be talking to a friend, watching TV, or listening to music. If you are happy and relaxed, you will be able to take better care of your baby.
• Take a break, leave your house and get out to meet up with friends. It is important that you forget your daily chores and your baby for sometime, it will help you cope better.
• Pack a bag with all the essentials the baby needs and keep it ready, so that you are ready to leave in a hurry.
• If your house has many floors, then make sure you have the baby's essentials on every floor, so that you don't have to run up and down.
• Try to prepare food that you can eat while holding the baby.
• If your baby doesn't sleep with you, for the first feed in the morning bring the baby to your room and lie together for sometime.

Remember no matter how hard you work, you may not be able to do all your household chores. The important thing is not to over burden yourself and to find time for yourself and to enjoy the new baby.

Life With Your Baby

The first few weeks with your baby will seem nothing more than chaotic and emotionally volatile. It will take about a month for both the mother and the baby to find and fit into a comfortable routine. By this time you would have learnt how many naps he has during the day and their approximate duration. You will know how often the baby needs a feed and at what intervals. You will have an idea of how many times they wake up at night. The baby will learn that you are the chief caregiver, and that you will feed him, clean him and comfort him when he cries. Depending on the way you interact and react to the baby, they will expect you to be talkative, quite, upset, clam or irritated:

Babies will also be developing their own personalities and will be learning things from you. If your behavior is not what the baby expected in a particular situation he will get upset and cry because there is a sudden unexpected change in behavior. Babies measure their worth by the response of their caregivers. So make sure you explicitly demonstrate to your baby that he is very special. As you feed, change, bath, clean and talk to your baby, they will look attentively at your face, observing all the changes in your expression as you speak. During our socialization process we have learnt that, we should speak to babies in an exaggerated manner so that, they can understand what we are saying and learn from it.

As a result, they will concentrate on your face as it is mobile, expressive and changes as you speak. It is from this interaction with you that the baby will learn to emote, speak and smile. This will form the basis for this interaction with the rest of society. Interact honestly with your baby. If you are getting angry, upset or irritated with your baby, it is better to express it than sending them confusing signals of being happy one minute and upset the next. If you think this is becoming a serious problem and you cannot seem to handle it alone, then seek help from your family or your doctor. Physical contact is essential for the baby to feel safe and secure. Physical contact encourages trust, which is basis to form other social relationships.

As the baby learns that if he smiles, you will pay more attention to him, he will do so more often. During the first month they only have a sense of time, they know that is they smile you will respond. When they are about six weeks old they will smile because they recognize you as an individual. At about the same time they learn that they can make noises and the sound that they hear from outside can be looked at. Once they discover this they will begin to turn towards external sound regularly. At the end of the second month, your baby will begin 'cooing' in response to your interaction with them. When you talk, they will 'coo'. Once they realize that they can coo, they will coo about everything that is happening around them, irrespective of your presence.

Babies will slowly but surely learn to control their movements from the time they are a month old. Even at this age they will try to support their head for a very short time, if held upright. When awake they keep moving their tiny hands and legs continuously trying to reach for things they can see. This is a good form of exercise as well. At this stage you can provide them with bright colored toys or toys that make pleasant noises or move. They try to look at these toys and reach for them and doing this will improve their eye-hand coordination. While doing this they realize that they can see and play with their hands as they lie on their back. So they will consciously bring their hand in their line of vision and move them about. The control over movement will increase as muscular development progresses. Your baby's development will normally follow this path in the initial months of your life together.

Storing Breast Milk

There are times when you may want to express breast milk. If your breast may be too full and hence hurt then it would be a good idea to express the milk and store it for later use. You may want to go out and would like the person minding your baby to feed the baby breast milk. You can express milk with your hand or with a breast pump

Hand Expression

To express breast milk with your hands you need:

• Sterile wide rimmed container to collect milk.
• Clean, washed hands.
• Privacy

1. Massage your breast gently to increase milk flow or use flannel to warm your breasts.
2. Hold your breast with one hand and with the fingertips of the other, move all around the breast stroking it gently. You can use the back of your knuckles, massaging from the outer edge of the breast to the nipple.
3. Once you have completely relaxed, place your hand behind the areola and start squeezing gently. You should be applying pressure on the milk sacs that are under the skin, at the edge of the areola. These sacs, will feel like peas under you fingertips.
4. As you squeeze in, milk will first drip out and then spurt. Move your hand all over the breast to remove milk from all the ducts.

Breast Pumps

There are a variety of breast pumps available today. You will have to very carefully select the pump that is best for you. If you choose the wrong one you may harm your breast tissue. It is best to consult your doctor before buying a pump. There are two types of pumps:

• Battery-operated Pumps: These are easy to use. But may not be very durable. These make less noise than electric pumps. Use a pump that has been designed to release suction at regular intervals to prevent excessive pressure.
• Electric Pumps: There are different kinds available in the market. Some come with a double pumping system, which is convenient for expressing milk from both breasts at the same time. Small and light pumps are available, which can be easily carried to work and when you travel. These pumps have adapters that can be fixed into, the cigarette lighter plug in your car to recharge it.

Storing Expressed Breast Milk

There are bags that are specially made to store expressed breast milk. You can use small disposable bottle bags or small glass or plastic bottles also. Depending on how soon you want to use the expressed milk either refrigerate it or freeze it. Here are a few tips you can follow:

• At room temperature fresh expressed milk can be stored for ten hours. Milk brought to room temperature after refrigerating or freezing, must be used within half an hour.
• Fresh expressed milk can be refrigerated for anything between five to seven days. Taste the milk to find out whether it is fresh before giving it to your baby.
• You can store freshly expressed milk for up to six months in an average freezer depending on the efficiency of the freezer. If ice cream is frozen solid, then your freezer can be used to freeze milk for six months. If ice cream stays soft, then you can store milk for three months. In the deep freeze milk can be stored for 12 months. Make sure you store in the coldest part of the freezer and away from the door.
• Pumped milk that has been refrigerated for less than 48 hours can be frozen. Milk that has been refrigerated for more that 48 hours should not be frozen.
• Freezing cause breast milk to expand. While filling bottles or bags leave about one inch from the top so that there is place for this expansion. If you are using a disposable bag fasten fold the top and fasten it with a rubber band.
• Milk containers should be labeled with the time and date on which it was expressed.
• If you can express large quantities of milk, do not store it in a big bottle or bag. Use small bags or bottles. The baby will need only small quantities at a time and you can defreeze one small bag or bottle each time. Thus wastage will be minimized.
• If you want to transport stored breast milk to use away from home, keep it cold till you use it. Use a cooler with ice or frozen packs to keep the milk cold while transporting it.
• The oldest milk should be used first.

Defrosting Expressed Breast Milk: Here are few ways to defrost:

• To thaw breast milk, use a hot bowl of tap water or do it at room temperature. Defrost using minimum amount of heat.
• Do not microwave to defrost, as it destroys the essential vitamins and enzymes in the milk.
• Feed the baby defrosted milk only when it has thawed completely.
• If the milk smells or tastes sour do not use it.
• Milk that has been thawed should be kept in the refrigerator and used within 24 hours.

Follow these measures to ensure express and store breast milk safely and efficiently till required.

Sterilization & Formula Milk

Everything that is used to feed that baby must be washed and sterilized thoroughly before and after use. Use a diluted solution of detergent to wash the bottles. Use a brush with a long handle to clean the bottles this will ensure that the bottom is also cleaned. Rinse well with water so that all the detergent is washed, clean and then sterilize. Modern methods of such as electric and microwave sterilizing are becoming very popular in the recent years. One should be aware of the traditional methods, which include boiling and cold water sterilizing too, as one may not have access to electricity and a microwave all the time.

1. Steam sterilizing: Electric steam sterilizing is similar to what is used in hospitals. This takes about eight to twelve minutes, excluding cooling time. This process is efficient and doesn't take long. You must use only those parts that are safe to boil. Bottles and nipples should be placed upside down to ensure proper sterilization. If you are using a microwave, you will have to buy a steamer for it. Do not place any metal parts inside the microwave. Sterilization in a microwave will take five to eight minutes plus cooling time. Remove the lid of the steamer very carefully as the interior becomes extremely hot. The greatest advantage of using this method of sterilization is that there is no smell or taste. If kept closed the items remain sterile for three hours.
2. Boiling: Is another method of sterilizing. All the bottle-feeding items need to be boiled for a minimum of 10 minutes. You must have a separate pan, only for the purpose of boiling these items. Some items like nipples or teats will have to be replaced more often if you use this method, as they get sticky.
3. Microwavable bottles: These bottles can be sterilized on their own in the microwave. A single bottle takes 90 seconds to get sterilized. While microwaving the bottles must be kept open.
4. Cold water sterilization: Tablets used for this method are available in the market. Dissolve them in the prescribed amount in the prescribed amount of water. This will form a solution that is effective against bacterial. These tablets are safe and will not have any side effects even if swallowed. You can buy a sterilizing unit for this or buy a bucket with a lid, which is used for this purpose alone. You must ensure that the bottles are completely submerged in the solution. For complete sterilization make sure that there are no air bubbles in the bottles. Sterilization should be complete in half an hour, but it is safe to leave items in the solution for 24 hours. Fresh solution must be made every day. Make sure your hands and washed before removing the sterilized equipment. Fill the bottles with milk and store them in the fridge for up to 24 hours. Keep bottles in the main part of fridge, as it is colder than the door. Keep away from raw food.

Do not leave sterilized bottles in the open for too long, as they lose their sterility rapidly. Having a sterilizer with a built-in storage facility is best, as items can be removed as and required. Once the bottles are sterilized you can make the baby's feed and store it. Here are a few tips for making the baby's feed:

• You can either make a bottle each time you need one, or make a number of bottles at one time.
• Bottle-milk can be kept in the fridge for 24 hours.
• If you want to warm the milk once you remove it from the fridge, just place in it a jug of hot water for sometime. Ensure that your baby is not near the jugs, as there have been a number of unfortunate instances where, babies have been scalded by tipping jugs.

Before making formula milk ensure that you read the instructions on the package carefully. Follow them exactly, as the proportion of water and formula powder has been calculated to provide the required amount of food and water for the baby. If you use too much water the baby will not get the required amount of calories and if too much formula is used, it may lead to dehydration. Follow the steps given below:

1. Fill the bottle exactly to the level required, with water that has been boiled and cooled.
2. Use the scoop provided to remove the formula from the package. Level the scoop each time with a knife that is clean. Do not press the powder into the scoop.
3. Put the formula into the bottle carefully, without dropping any of it.
4. Fit the cap of the bottle securely and shake well till all the formula dissolves.
5. Drip one or two drops of this milk on the back of your palm, to make sure that it is not too hot, before feeding the baby.

Solution To Breast-Feeding Problems

Both mother and baby will have to learn to master the art of breast-feeding. This will take time and what works for one pair need not necessarily work for another pair. If you face problems ask your nurse or doctor to help you out. Given below are the causes and solution to some of the common breast-feeding problems:

1. Baby wants to keep feeding all the time: This is normally caused because the baby is not positioned properly and there is insufficient supply of milk. In the initial days the baby may insist on feeding continuously simply because he enjoy it and it is very comforting. It could happen if the baby is trying to increase the supply of milk. If this activity is a change from his normal feeding pattern then it may return to normal in a day or two. Make sure that you position them properly and let them feed on demand.
2. Bleeding/sore /cracked/nipples: This happens because the baby is sucking your nipple and not the breast as a result of bad positioning. Dislodge the baby, by inserting your finger gently into his mouth to break his grip. The reposition your breast so that the breast not just the nipple is inside his mouth. Try different positions. Express milk and rub it on the nipples this will help it heal. Use the less sore side to feed.
3. White marks on sore nipples that don't seem to heal: This is known as thrush, it can appear when either you or the baby have taken a course of antibiotics or may appear without any particular reason. Both of you may have to take oral medication or use anti-fungal cream.
4. Flat nipples or lumpy, hard and full breasts: Primary engorgement takes place when milk first 'fills in' on the third or fourth day. Secondary engorgement takes place when the baby reduces the number of feeds he takes maybe, because he has started sleeping for longer hours at night. If this is case, your body will reduce the amount of milk it is producing. Feed the baby more often to reduce engorgement. If baby is unable to latch on properly, the express some milk to help it do so. Wear warm flannel clothing to ensure milk flow or have a warm shower before feeding to ensure the same. Using chilled cabbage leaves inside your bra can reduce the swelling.
5. Tender, small lump in the breast: Free movement of milk is stopped because of a block in some duct of the breast. This can happen because you have slept in funny position, sat for a few hours with the seat belt across your breast or a tight bra. Massaging the area or using warm compress on the area will help the lump to dissolve. If possible, position the baby in such a way that, his jaw is near the lump so he can feed and help dissolving the lump. Feed from the sore side, if it doesn't work express milk from the breast.
6. Inflamed, red areas on the breast; along with flu symptoms like temperature, aches, sore breast that is full: This is known as Mastitis, which is an inflammation of the breast when milk leaks into the breast tissue. Rest as much as possible, but continue to feed the baby, starting with the sore side. Use of warm and cold compress will reduce the swelling. If there is no improvement go to your doctor who will probably prescribe painkillers or a course of antibiotics.
7. Baby refuses to feed from the breast: There could be a number of reasons for this:

• A change in the taste of milk because of a change in diet or medication.
• You are using nipple cream.
• You have stopped using nipple shields.
• You are undergoing dental treatment or your periods are starting.

Whatever the case maybe, continue feeding your baby. Try feeding when he is almost asleep he may not notice the change in taste. When you decide to stop using nipple shields do it gradually, by trimming more and more of the shield each day so that the baby gets used to it. If nothing works you will have to express milk in order to maintain milk supply.

Breast - Feeding Twins: When you have twins the task of breast-feeding becomes a little more difficult and there is the often-asked question of about whether to feed them together or one at a time. Feeding one baby at a time improves bonding between mother and child. But this can be time consuming. Letting the feed together will improve your milk supply and it will be easy to remember who has had how much. If you decide to feed them together then placing one baby under each arm is the best position to use. You can also criss-cross them on your lap and feed them together. Swapping the babies between the breasts ensures equal production of milk. But using one breast exclusively to feed one baby will customize the supply for that baby and ensure that he gets sufficient hind milk.

Breastfeeding Positions

When you are new mother, there are a number of things that you have to learn and teach your baby. One of them is to breast-feed. Sit down comfortably. The baby should be on his side facing you. Tuck the baby close to you, with his head on your forearm. His nose should be opposite your nipple and in level with it. If you find it easier use a pillow at first. When his mouth is wide open, bring him towards your breast, allow him to take as much of your breast as possible. His tongue should be under your breast. If your breast hurts a lot or he manages to dislodge himself, start again. Repeat this till you get it right and feel him lodged firmly. Things you should be able to see:

• Baby tucked close to your body.
• The chin should be against your breast and stretched upward and not tucked in.
• Mouth should be open wide and their bottom lip should curl outwards.
• There should be movement of the face and jaw.
• Lower lip should take in more of the areola that the upper lip.

Things that you shouldn't see:

• Cheeks that are sucked in.
• Lip action as if they are sucking a straw.

Sounds you should hear:

• Slow and quick sounds of milk being swallowed.

Sounds you should not hear:

• Clicking noises
• Smacking lips

You should feel:

• Being firmly gripped.
• Feel the letdown reflex, a tingling feeling in the breasts, usually when feeding begins as the milk flows to the baby.
• Slight pain when the baby begins to feed, in the initial weeks.

You should not feel:

• Pain lasting longer than the initial momentary pain.

If you feel, hear and see things that you shouldn't, then put your finger gently inside the baby's mouth, between the corner of his mouth and your breast. This will stop his suckling and prevent you from becoming sore. Re-position the baby.

Before you begin breast-feeding, make sure that you are comfortable, relaxed and have enough support. Make whatever arrangements are required to keep you comfortable while feeding. Remember the following:

• Tuck the baby close to you
• His ear, shoulder and hip should be in the same line and not twisted.
• Always ensure the baby is facing your breast, if he is turning away feeding becomes more difficult for them.

Memorize 'tummy to mummy/chest to chest/nose to nipple/chin to breast'.

There are a number of positions to breast-feed a baby. Here are a few of them:

Traditional position: Keep a few pillows on your lap; place the baby on it so that he is on the same level as your breasts. Support his head with your forearm in such a way that the rest of his body in across your stomach. You can help by cupping his head in your hand (use your right hand for left breast and vice versa).

Underarm position: Arrange a few cushions at your side and place the baby on it in such a way that his legs are pointing behind you. Hold your baby in such a way with your right hand that you cradle his head while he feeds from your right breast. Women with Caesarean section use this position use this position to avoid pressure on the scar. Twins can be breast-fed together using this position.

Lying down: Lie on the bed with your head resting on a pillow and place the baby close to you. The bed will give them the support they need. With your free hand bring them to your breast and support them. Keep pillows behind your back to prevent a backache.

Find a position that is comfortable for both you and your baby so that breast-feeding is easy.

Bottle-Feeding For Breastfed Babies

Deciding to bottle-feed your breast-feeding baby is a conscious step taken by mothers when they want to return to their original routines. Either they want some time off from their babies or want to go back to working. It is better to think carefully about bottle-feeding as many children learn to use a cup for drinking without going through the bottle phase. Bottles need to be sterilized very well, otherwise they will breed germs and your baby will easily fall ill. Not all babies need to be taught to bottle-feed, a number of them take to it without much fuss. Timing plays an important role. If bottle-feeding is introduced too soon, then the baby may give up breast-feeding. If introduced too late the baby may not want to give up breast-feeding.

Once you have decided to bottle-feed, you either use expressed breast milk or artificial milk also called formula. Expressing milk can be a tedious task. You can use your hand or a breast pump. Once expressed the milk will have to store it in a previously sterilized container. You will have to express a number to times to collect enough milk for your baby. Formula milk is dried cow' milk which has been modified to suit the baby's digestive abilities. Most doctors recommend a soya-based formulation. It is important to prepare formula milk exactly according to the instructions provided. It this milk is diluted the baby will not receive the required number of calories. If it is too thick it can lead to dehydration.

The bottles and nipples or teats will have to be well sterilized as milk breeds bacteria easily. It must be remembered that formula milk increases the risk of infection and illness. It is best to exclusively breast-feed the baby for the first few months. The baby does not need water or fruit juices till he starts having solids. Giving him these could reduce the efficiency with which breast milk works in protecting the baby against infection. We still have not found a method to artificially produce breast milk. Breast milk produces hormones and antibodies in such a way that it fights germs specific to the baby's environment. Research on these is still in its initial stages.

Even after you start bottle-feeding it is best to continue breast-feeding as well. This is known as mixed feeding. Introduce the bottle after breast-feeding is well established. Once you start bottle-feeding, your milk supply will decrease; as the number of breast-feeds the baby will have decreases. You can increase the supply by breast-feeding often. Whenever you have the time let the baby feed on demand, this will help supply increase. Many working women like to continue breast-feeding their babies once the go back to work, as it helps to bond again after their brief absence.

Concern About Feeding Baby

There is no doubt about the fact the breast-feeding is better than feeding the baby formula milk. Many mothers would like their babies to bottle-feed after sometime. Some babies who have been breast-feeding may take to bottle-feeding as soon as it is introduced. Babies may prefer it especially if they are have trouble breast-feeding. But many breast-fed babies refuse being bottle-fed. Practical experience shows that this is especially true with children, as they grow older. You could try using different kinds of nipples or teats. Making the teat soft by boiling it or using different types of teats may help. Often the babies who refuse the bottle are the ones who have been breast-fed.


You should hold the baby him the same position while, bottle-feeding it as you do while breast-feeding him. You should encourage your partner or baby sitter to bottle-feed the baby, as he will not expect to be breast-fed by them and may take to bottle-feeding more easily. Try changing the formula you use, as it could to that the baby dislikes the taste. Research has shown that if the bottle is introduced early, when the baby is about six weeks old, even for just one or two feeds a week, the baby is more likely to accept being bottle-fed on a regular basis. But is has been found that newborn babies, who have been bottle-fed regularly, often forget how to breast-feed.

They may even need help to relearn how to breast-feed. Experts are still trying to find an explanation for this behavior. It is best to introduce bottle-feeding only after breast-feeding is well established. If you want to avoid using a bottle then you could try spoon-feeding your baby or use cups specially made for babies. These special cups are used, when breast-feeding immediately after birth, is not possible. It has been found that, babies who use these cups comfortably take to breast-feeding later on. But it is important to learn the correct technique of using this cup, from a trained person. Mothers are often concerned and wonder whether bottle-feeding will cause complications. Bottle-fed babies grow to be just as healthy as breast-fed babies.

Breast-feeding does not ensure that you child will never fall ill. Although studies show that they are more resistant to common ailments as compared to formula-fed babies. Colic in babies, in both cases is more or less the same. Where sleep is concerned, it is true that formula-fed babies, sleep better and longer at night. One possible explanation is that, formula milk takes longer to digest than breast milk. Therefore, babies who are bottle-fed sleep longer between feeds. Another reason is that, making bottle-feed at night is a difficult process. Mothers may try to ensure that babies sleep through the night. As breast-feeding is easier, mothers may not find waking up at night, a problem to feed their baby. Ultimately, it is for the mother to decide what is the best option for her and her baby.

Understanding Breast Feeding

Since we have established that breast-feeding is best for your baby for the first six months of his life. It is a good idea to understand how the breast produces milk. Each breast is divided into lobes and this is where milk is produced. Individual lobes have as many as 15 to 25 tubes that convey milk to the nipples. These tubes widen on the way to the areola (the dark area around your nipples) where milk collects before being expressed. Studies with the help of infrared photographs show that the breasts grow hot when a baby cries. As a result blood rushes to the breasts bringing with it sugars to the milk glands.

As the baby suckles, oxytocin is released into the bloodstream, causing the muscle cells around the milk gland to contract and squeeze out milk that tastes sweet. The squeezing is also known as "the let-down reflex'. Before this reflex takes place, the baby gets some milk. This milk is called 'fore milk', which satisfies the baby's immediate need and is rich in protein. The milk that follow is known as 'hind milk' is more satisfying as it, has more fat and hence more calories. The 'let-down reflex' has to be stimulated for milk supply to build up. Let your baby decide how much milk needs to be produced. Feed him on demand do not regulate his feeding. If you do this the baby and your breasts will work in coordination and your breasts will produce milk according to your baby's requirement.

Breast Feeding Your Baby

Breast milk is the best food for your baby for the first six months of his life. Studies have proved beyond doubt that, babies who have been breast fed for the first six months of their lives, stay healthier throughout their lives. It is very important that, you feed the baby the first milk your breast produces, known as colostrum. This is rich in antibodies and other substances that protect the baby from infections and illness. If you have a family history of diabetes, asthma, eczema etc. formula milk and increase the risk of these diseases in the baby.

Breast-feeding prevents illnesses like chest infections, ear infections and diarrhea. Protection for some illness last long after you have stopped breast-feeding. Feeding the baby breast milk only, will provide the best protection against infections. Even a combination of breast milk and formula milk will decrease the risk of infection considerably. Even mothers benefit from breast-feeding their babies. The cases of breast cancer, ovarian cancer and osteoporosis, at a later stage in life are much less among women who have breast-fed their babies.

If you decide to combine breast-feeding with bottle-feeding then, bottle-feeding should be introduced only after the baby gets used to breast- feeding. This will ensure that you have sufficient supply of breast milk. If you are unsure about whether to breast-feed or bottle-feed, it is better to start breast-feeding. As if you start bottle-feeding it is difficult to change to breast-feeding. Bottle-feeding is more expensive than breast-feeding as well. Here are some ways to ensure a good milk supply:

• As soon as your baby feed, your body produces more milk to replace it. The more they feed the more milk your body produces. Your baby knows how much milk he needs. So let him feed as often as he wants to and your breast will produce milk according to his requirement.
• Eat well; this will help in the production of milk.
• If you supplement your baby's diet with some other fluid, then your milk remains in your breast. As a result the body will produce less milk the next time. In the initial days it is best to exclusively breast-feed your baby to ensure good supply of milk. Even if the infant has jaundice he will make a quick recovery with breast milk.
• For most women breast-feeding gets established by six weeks. After this it will be difficult to disturb the supply. Missing feeds may make you uneasy and you may have to express milk. Not feeding your baby for a long can cause an inflammation of the breast known as mastitis.
• If you decide to bottle-feed the baby for a specific number of feeds and breast-feed him for the rest, then your body will continue to produce milk, but at a lesser rate. This will help working mothers whose babies can be bottle-fed when they are away, and breast-fed when their mothers return home.

Another important feature of breast-feeding is establishing breast-feeding. This takes place when:

• You can feed in a comfortable and relaxed manner.
• When the attaches himself to you breast easily.
• The baby feeds with ease.
• You feel no discomfort when the baby feeds.
• You can breast-feed him without any fuss even when you go out.

It is best to breast-feed the baby for the first six months, without any other supplement.

Using Cloth Diapers

As cloth diapers are cheaper and they can be washed and reused, some parents prefer them. There are different types of cloth diapers. The traditional ones are square shaped and need to be pinned up. Modern ones are layered and have Velcro snaps. There are absorbent liners that can be used inside cloth diapers, which are disposable. Cloth diapers are double lined for greater protection for night use. Diaper covers made of plastics are available to prevent leaks. There are two ways of fastening traditional cloth diapers: the triangular fold and rectangular fold.

• The square is folded into half to form a triangle.
• Place the baby gently on the triangle in such a way that his back is on the longest side and the opposite corner pointing to his feet.
• Bring the front part between his legs onto his stomach.
• Bring one side to overlap the middle part.
• Bring the other side to overlap the two parts. Pin them together using a safety pin.

Rectangular Fold:

• Fold the square into a rectangle.
• Place the baby on the rectangle.
• Bring the bottom part between his legs onto his stomach.
• Bring one side around and pin with the center part then bring the other side and pin again.

Tips to remember while using cloth diapers:

• If the diaper requires pins, use large pins with plastic safety heads. While pinning the diaper place your hand between the baby and the diaper. This will ensure that you do not prick the baby. Alternatively you can use diaper tapes.
• Diapers that are wet can be put into the diaper bin. If soiled, the stools should be emptied into the toilet. You can rinse them if you want before putting them into the diaper bin, to wash later.
• Use a solution of baking soda and water for your last rinse, as this will control odor.
• Wash diapers separately. Do not do it with the rest of your laundry.
• Use mild detergent that is recommended for baby clothing.
• Use hot water to rinse each wash.
• Wash your hands well after each diaper change to prevent germs from spreading.

Bathing And Cleaning Your Baby

By the time, the baby is a few weeks old; you will have a bath routine in place. Even so it will help to remember the following:

• Bathing environment should be calm and warm.
• The baby should not be hungry or tired.
• Everything you need should be ready and at hand.

Some babies do not like having a bath. So instead you can 'top and tail' or sponge the baby everyday for sometime:

1. Wrap your baby in a towel to stop them from waving their arms. Undress them only if you want to.
2. Wipe his eye with a little cotton wool that has been dipped in cooled boiled water. Begin with the inside of his eye and work outward. Wipe the other eye with another piece of cotton wool.
3. Use wet cotton wool to wipe over and behind his ear. Use fresh piece of cotton wool for each ear.
4. Wipe their face, neck and under their chin with damp flannel or cotton wool.
5. Pat dry with a soft towel making sure that they are not damp in the creases.
6. Wipe dry their hands.
7. Change their nappy after cleaning nappy area and change into clean clothes. Using special bedtime clothes can help them get used to a bedtime routine.

Hair: You need not wash your baby's hair everyday. Just wiping it with a damp flannel cloth will remove any dirt that is there.

Nails: The easiest way to cut your baby's nails is to nibble them off. You can use a pair of scissors to cut them off while they are asleep. The best time would be after a bath, when the nails are soft.

Ears and Nose: These organs clean themselves, so just wipe them gently with wet cotton wool.

Cradle cap: This is a yellowish crust on the baby's scalp, which looks a little like dandruff. This occurs when the baby is between a month and six months old and almost all babies have it. This does not harm the baby in any way and normally disappears as the baby grows up. If it is noticeable you can do the following:

• Use a baby shampoo.
• Massage one tablespoon of olive oil or almond oil into his scalp. Leave it on for an hour then wash it clean by shampooing.
• Apply oil carefully to ensure that it does not enter the baby's eyes. The baby should not touch the oil as it may get into his eyes after that.
• Bicarbonate of soda rinse: Dissolve a teaspoon of soda in 500 ml of warm water and apply on scalp with the help of cotton wool. Shampoo thoroughly. Use this regime once or twice a week.
• The flakes will become loose if you gently comb his hair gently.
• Never pick or scratch to loosen the flakes.
• If serious or you see red patches on the baby's neck and behind his ears then consult a doctor immediately.

All About Baby Stools

The newborn baby's first nappy content is meconium, which is a greenish black substance that was in the baby's system before he was born. It can upset you if you are not prepared for it. But its presence shows that the baby's excretory system is functioning normally. The stools of breast-feeding babies are not smelly and are normally mustard or yellow colored and extremely loose. If the stool is green-colored sometimes this means that bile salts have not been re-absorbed totally. This may mean that your baby has colic, but sometimes happens without any reason.

Most often breast-feeding mothers can see a direct relationship between what they eat and their baby's stools. Babies who are bottle-fed have stools that is more formed and light brown in color. While being weaned, babies may have multi-colored stools. More often than not, they are of the same color as what they have eaten. Sometimes you may observe that some types of food have been passed through without being digested. Do not include these foods as part of the baby's diet for a few days.

The frequency with which your baby passes stools may vary. Sometimes breast-fed babies may not pass stools for many days or even a week. This is normal. Others may fill their nappy just before every feed. Some babies cry while passing stools. This is normal and if the stools are soft then your baby is not constipated. You will see that your baby's stools change a little from day to day. If there is a big change, like the stool has become very loose, very smelly, very hard or especially if there is mucous or blood in the stools then you should consult your doctor immediately.

Cleaning&Diapering Your Baby

New mothers will learn that the two activities that take up most of their time is feeding the baby and cleaning him. You will have to change diapers through the day and night at regular intervals for the first few months. Sometimes you will realize that through the day all you have done is feed and clean the baby and have not found time to do any of the other household chores. The only way to handle this pressure is to be organized and have a system arranging nappies, clothes, changing sheets, wash clothes and everything required by the baby in such a way that you can find it easily. Here are a few suggestions made by some parents:

• If your house has more than one floor, establish a 'nappy changing station' on each floor of the house so that you have all the things you need on every floor and you don't have to keep running up and down.
• Keep a bag packed and ready with all the necessary baby items so that you can just pick it up and leave when you are going out.
• Baby clothes can be put into a bucket of dilute soap solution, as soon as they are soiled and let to soak before washing.
• Buy soft muslin that can be used to wipe the baby clean.

The other activity that takes up a lot of your time with a newborn is changing his diapers. You will need sometime to get used to changing diapers. Here is a list of things that you need to keep within reach while changing diapers:

• A diaper.
• If you are using a cloth diaper you will need fasteners to fasten the diaper and keep it in place.
• A bowl of warm water and cotton balls or clean washcloth or diaper wipes if the baby is older. Babies have soft sensitive skin; it would be best to use warm water to wash them.
• Nappy rash cream or petroleum jelly for protection against rashes.
• A changing mat, cloth or another diaper to place the baby on if you are not using a changing table.

Ensure that all these items are close to you, so that you don't have to leave the baby to get these things.

Wiping Clean: Use a wet washcloth, cotton balls or baby wipes and gently clean your baby. Always clean from front to back. Never wipe from back to front and this will spread bacteria forward from the anus and cause urinary tact infection especially so in girls. You will be able to clean better if you lift your baby's legs. Remember to clean the creases of the buttocks and thighs. While cleaning boys you should cover the penis with a clean washcloth or diaper, as exposure to air causes them to urinate on anything that is within range, which may include you. After wiping them pat dry with clean washcloth and if required apply nappy rash cream.

Disposable Diapers: If you are using disposable diapers here are a few tips you can follow:

• Slip the open diaper under the baby while lifting his legs. The adhesive strip at the back must be aligned with the baby's navel.
• Bring the front of the diaper between his legs up to his belly.
• Bring adhesive strips in front and fasten.
• Dispose bowel movements in the toilet before putting diaper into garbage. This not only ensures that the diaper doesn't stink but prevents growth of bacteria.
• If the diaper is tight, you will find marks around the baby's legs and waist. Get a larger size the next time.
• If your baby is sensitive to a particular brand of diaper he may develop rash, change the diaper brand.
• While fastening a diaper for a baby boy, make sure that the penis is placed downwards; this will ensure that there are no leaks from the waistline.

Prevent diaper/nappy rash: Nappy rash is very common among babies, but if it lasts for over three days consult your doctor immediately. Tips to prevent and heal nappy rash:

• Change nappy as quickly as possible every time the baby wet his nappy or soils it.
• Use nappy rash cream to prevent rashes. Use a cream that contains zinc oxide, which acts as a barrier against moisture.
• Do not use a diaper for your baby for a few hours each day.
• While washing cloth nappies use detergents that are dye and fragrance free.

These tips should be able to give use a good start to learning to clean your baby and diaper him.

Traveling With A Baby

Though you may be traveling less frequently once you have a baby till he is a little old, it does not mean that you stop taking holidays because of the little ones. But you will have to make elaborate plans well in advance. Being away from home is a big change in routine for both your baby and you, so you will have to plan ahead, even anticipate problems so that the entire family has a good holiday. Getting advice from parents who have taken their children on holidays is a good idea. Here are a few tips about things that worked for other parents:

• While booking a holiday find out what facilities the tour operator provides. Children who are two years below usual travel free.
• Find out what kind of childcare facilities the operator provides like baby cots, prams, highchairs etc. so that you do not have to carry these things with you.
• Your baby will require a passport.
• Once you decide on the holiday location, consult your doctor about the vaccination your baby requires before you decide the holiday dates. If there are vaccines to be taken then it is best to take them a little before the holiday date. Some vaccines cannot be taken together and may need a few weeks in between. So you will need time to vaccinate your baby.
• The most difficult part of your holiday will be the journey and with a small baby it will not be easy. You should book an air cot well in advance. Get seats that are together so that you have ample space on the flight. Book meals for your children in advance, it would help if they could be served before you are served.
• If you are hiring a car ask the company to provide you with a baby seat so that you don't have to carry one.
• Take toys for the journey old and new ones, so that the baby will be occupied and will not get tired of the journey.
• There could be delays on the way, so you should carry enough snacks for the baby especially drinks. It is better if the snacks don't consist of sticky food, as they are messy.
• It is easier to travel if you are breast-feeding, you don't have to worry about sterilized bottles or clean water to make bottle-feeds.
• Take your baby sling or back carrier it will occupy less space and it will be easy to carry the baby around.
• If you are holidaying in a place where the weather is hot, make sure that you carry sun block for your baby and his skin is delicate and more likely to get sunburns.
• While booking your holiday you can book a hotel that provides childcare facilities such as nannies, crèches etc. You should check them before using them, if you are satisfied with the facilities provided, the ability of the child minder and you think it is appropriate for your age make use of it.

Childbirth Expectations and Concerns

With the arrival of the baby the relationship between husband and wife will undergo a change. There maybe some initial strain and tension in the relationship. But there is nothing that the two partners cannot solve by making time for each other and talking things out. After childbirth each partner has his or her own expectations and apprehensions. Some of the things that men worry about after childbirth are:

• · Earning enough for the family.
• · Kind of father they will make.
• · Fear of feeling left out as his wife will be devoting all her time to the baby.

A woman too has her own fears and apprehensions:

• · Whether her husband will help and support her.
• · Whether she will have to take care of her husband's needs and the baby's needs.
• · Whether the baby will affect their relationship.

To begin with the baby may interfere in the relationship between husband and wife. But over a period of time these differences can be resolved. It is important to talk and listen to each other. Here are a few tips how to be a good listener:

• Pay complete attention to your partner, look at them and sit close to them.
• Do not think about yourself think of the other person.
• Listen to what your partner has to say and if necessary, say it to yourself again so that you remember it clearly.
• Clarify things that you do not understand or want explained immediately. This will show that you are paying attention to what is being said.
• Before placing your point of view wait for your partner to finish. Give yourself sometime and think over what your partner has said, before replying.
• Give advice only when your partner asks for it.
• Do not let your ego affect the relationship.

Not only must your listen carefully but, also, you must be able to put across your problems, feelings and point of view in an affective manner. Here are a few suggestions on how to talk:

• Pick the right time to speak.
• While speaking make sure you are taking about how you feel and about your problems and accusing your partner.
• If you disagree on something, then just agree to disagree, do not have the last word. This will make things worse; do not let your ego get in the way of the relationship.

Once you become parents, it becomes very difficult for both partners, to find time to spend together as a couple. A newborn baby takes up all the time of both the mother and the father. Though it may seem that the baby is affecting your relationship, it is not so. A baby doesn't damage a good relationship and a baby doesn't improve a bad one. It is ultimately up to the partners to find time for each other no matter how difficult it is or how tired they are. Here are a few things you can do to keep your relationship alive:

• For some time each day continue to think of your partner as your lover and not the father or mother of your child.
• Spend time with the baby together, play and cuddle the baby together. This will give you quality time together and as a family.
• Once a week ask a friend or a family member to take care of the baby for a few hours so that both of you have time together alone.

Sexual relationship maybe affected to a great extent once the baby is born. Since this important aspect of your relationship is affected this may take a toll on your relationship. As a new mother the demands of your baby, exhaustion, unhappiness with bodily changes after childbirth and the effect of breastfeeding on sex drive all affect sex drive after birth. Your partner may feel that you have only time for the baby and not for him. While you may feel that everyone is only making demands on you and you don't have any time to rest or to yourself. Making time to improve your sexual relationship will help you and your partner. Here are few things you should remember:

• There is no right time to restart your sex life.
• Intercourse is not necessary. Just lying together, cuddling together and spending time together can improve your relationship and make you comfortable with your body.
• If sex in painful even after healing then you should consult your doctor.
• The vagina is an elastic and supple tissue, which heals quickly.
• A woman's body was created to bear children.
• The human body has great recuperation powers.
• If you still feel that you and your partner are having problems with your sexual relationship then you could get counseling.